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ilovedyousomuch
cold became my warmth, i was crazy, i felt so much. i wanted to die, i thought about it every day. i repeated it. i wanted to die. i loved you daniel. i planned to kill myself, it was the only thing that brought me comfort when you would leave, when we would fight and you would leave. the sex we had was the best sex of my life, i never told you that, i never explained my devotion to you. the pain was so much, the winter was so cold. it was so cold. i wanted to die and you were my breath and my warmth and you hurt me so much. you hated me, you loved me and kept me and hated me. you made love to my body, you made my nerves do things. you fucked my throat and i was so goddamn devoted to you. on my couch, really the last time, you gave it to me, you took it from me. this ghost of us, this beautiful beautiful ghost. i almost died.